my first ever GIMP project…!

nothing at all special or really that great, but it was my first time ever using GIMP (I have, in the past, used photoshop, but not usually in creating any sort of “digital art” (I guess you’d call it that?) as I’ve done here.
& it took me a pretty freaking ridiculous amount of time: I’d say over 6 hours.  & I would’ve probably spent way longer, but once I got to the point I got here I decided not to try & overkill it with too much & it turn out worse lol.
so, I’m kinda proud of this one :P I definitely know it’s nothing too special, but considering I’d never tried something like this before, I was glad to know I was capable of something that’s so time consuming, & irritating to work on at some points, haha.
& I won’t lie & say I just did all this by myself (HA! I couldn’t have, barely knowing how to work around this program which I am running through my laptop with Linux).  I followed this awesome tutorial, & highly suggest it for new users (or even experienced ones) wanting to make this… “vintage pop art” type stuff :)

well, I hope someone thinks it’s kinda cool!  :)

I realise some of the text turned out somewhat difficult to read, so:
top left:
“It’s so nice
to wake up in the morning/all alone
and not have to tell somebody
you love them
when you don’t love them
any
more.”
bottom left:
“& I plan to be forgotten when I’m gone;”

I want my life’s soundtrack to be known;

because I want people who know me to think of me when they hear these songs;
because I want people who don’t know me to have a good idea of who I am, because these songs accurately describe me in a way I could never;
because I want others to know of these masterpieces, in hopes it will bring to them what these songs have brought to me.

cheesy? perhaps. but I’m going to list out the songs that have made a permanent impact on me, & will always give me chills.

(alphabetical order by artist/band; I could never pick favourites from my favourites.)

there are a lot, but these are ones that I feel deserve to make this list of mine.  I might add a few more here & there as I think of them.  anyway, here they are:

SONGS:
“Is There a Ghost” – Band of Horses
“General Specific” – Band of Horses
“Megan” – Bayside
“Winter” – Bayside
“Across the Universe” – The Beatles
“In My Place” – Coldplay
“Warning Signs” – Coldplay
“O! Valencia” – The Decemberists
“The Crane Wife 3” – The Decemberists
“Insomnia” – Electric President
“How to Save a Life” – The Fray
“Missed the Boat” – Modest Mouse
“Ghost” – Neutral Milk Hotel
“April 8th” (Different Version?) – Neutral Milk Hotel
“Champagne Supernova” – Oasis
“Fireflies” – Owl City
“Cave In” – Owl City
“Moth’s Wings” – Passion Pit
“Cigarettes” – Russian Red
“A Call to Apathy (Tentative Title)” – The Shins
“Kissing the Lipless” – The Shins
“Pink Bullets” – The Shins
“Sleeping Lessons” – The Shins
“Discovering the Waterfront” – Silverstein
“Call it Karma” (Acoustic) – Silverstein
“Steal Tomorrow” – Tallest Man on Earth
“The Gardener” – Tallest Man on Earth
“Ten Dead Dogs” – Wild Sweet Orange

it may be a little redundant, but I might as well list the BEST ALBUMS of all time while I’m at it :)
these are the albums that I could listen to– start to finish– any day at any time.
TRUE masterpieces.

ALBUMS:
Cease to Begin – Band of Horses
Rush of Blood to the Head – Coldplay
The Moon & Antarctica – Modest Mouse
We Were Dead Before the Ship Sank – Modest Mouse
In the Aeroplane Over the Sea – Neutral Milk Hotel
Ocean Eyes – Owl City
Discovering the Waterfront – Silverstein
Shallow Grave – Tallest Man on Earth
We Have Cause to be Uneasy – Wild Sweet Orange

“thirty books everyone should read before they’re thirty”

www.divinecaroline.com/22189/98450-thirty-books-everyone-read-they-re

^^ link to site I got this list from.
I think it’d be cool if I got ALL of these read.. except by the age of 20 rather than 30.
two years is plenty of time!

— I will cross out the ones I’ve already read & rate them on a scale from 1-5 (with “*”) (1 = pretty lame, 5 = an all-time favourite)
— personal comments will be in italics.

1. Siddhartha by Hermann Hesse

2. 1984 by George Orwell (**)
— I know everyone just adores this book, but I found it hard to get into (despite my love for dystopian-based literature).  Huxley is my all-time favourite author– I feel like Orwell just doesn’t compare & the book just kinda bothered me.  still a decent read though, I guess.

3. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee (*****)
— DEFINITELY on my top 10 of  favourites.  I could (& have) read this over & over again, & I will never fully understand the beautiful feeling it gives me every time I read it :)

4. A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess
— I think this is a movie my boyfriend told me about recently, saying I needed to watch it.  I had no idea it was a book?  well, I’m sure if he thinks I’d enjoy the movie, the book will probably be 10x more enjoyable :)

5. For Whom the Bell Tolls by Ernest Hemingway

6. War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy

7. The Rights of Man by Tom Paine
— hm.  well I’ve never read any of Tom Paine’s other works, & didn’t think I’d ever want to.  but I wanna try to read all that’s on this list! (not like it’s more special than any other “top books” list, I just found this one & stuck with it :P)

8. The Social Contract by Jean-Jacques Rousseau

9. One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel García Márquez

10. The Origin of Species by Charles Darwin
— eh, not too excited to read this thriller.  I mean, I took AP biology– I appreciate it & all.  just never had the desire to sit down & read it all lol.

11. The Wisdom of the Desert by Thomas Merton

12. The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell

13. The Wind in the Willows by Kenneth Graham

14. The Art of War by Sun Tzu
— I remember my sophomore year in highschool, I had a brilliant AP world history teacher who begged us to read this.  guess I’ll finally do it?!

15. The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien (****)
— LOTR fanatic til the day I die!  but I need to reread the trilogy– last time I read any of them was probably about 6 years ago.  I’m sure I’ll appreciate the books even more now.

16. David Copperfield by Charles Dickens

17. Four Quartets by T.S. Eliot

18. Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
— yeah, I really need to finally read this one.

19. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald (****)
— one of my boyfriend’s favourites.  I didn’t care for the way it’s written, as it didn’t really grab me like most books do.  but, MARVELOUS story that really makes you think.  Fitzgerald, though I’m not the biggest fan of his writing style, excellently conveyed a sense of complete understanding of society through people’s actions & intents.  even in his “younger, more vulnerable years.” (sorry, couldn’t resist) :)

20. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger (****)
— man.  when I read this the first time, I didn’t get it like, the WHOLE way through.  but when I finished it, I was crazy in love with it!  after rereading it, I realised that I just wasn’t really used to the dry styling Salinger used in his storytelling, but I think that’s what makes this book all the more real.

21. Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

22. The Prince by Niccolo Machiavelli

23. Walden by Henry David Thoreau (****)
— I rated this ****’s, though I haven’t read it all.  I’ve read excerpts, which I ADORED.  it’s sad how many times, though, I’ve been in barnes & noble, ABOUT to buy this book so I could read it in it’s entirety, but for whatever reason didn’t.  but I KNOW how much I love it, & I can’t WAIT to get that freaking book & read the hell out of it!

24. The Republic by Plato (*****)
— you don’t want to get me started on how much I love Plato’s Republic.  I thank God everyday for taking Introductory Philosophy my first semester at my junior college… because I got 6 weeks of non-stop Socrates.  good for the fucking soul.  I LOVE The Republic.  LOVE IT.

25. Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov

26. Getting Things Done by David Allen

27. How To Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

28. Lord of the Flies by William Golding (**)
— eh.  good message.  annoying story.  it’s alright, though.

29. The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck (***)
— well.  what can I say about Steinbeck… should I go into disgustingly perfect detail about what I think? …just messing around.  I KNOW he’s brilliant & can paint a picture with words better than an artist can with actual paint.  but this story was so muddled with his talks of turtles crossing roads (I UNDERSTAND it’s symbolism, but a whole fucking chapter? lol).  it’s another one of those “I love the story, but getting through it was hard” kind of things.  but Steinbeck I actually really dislike.  some of his work I do rea;;y enjoy– don’t get me wrong.  but the first novel of his I ever read was “The Pearl” in 7th grade.  I. hate. that. fucking. book.  I’ve reread it twice to make sure, & yes.  definitely one of my least favourites ever.  lol.

30. The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov

31. BONUS: How To Cook Everything by Mark Bittman

32. BONUS: Honeymoon with My Brother by Franz Wisner

_________________________________

so unlike most other “must-read books” lists I’ve ever stumbled upon before, I know VERY few of these.  like, a good half of the titles I don’t recognize at all?
but it’s a good thing I haven’t heard of them & it’s not the same old list you see everywhere.  it’s different, & it seems like it’ll take me through a journey of books I would have never even thought to have read in the past!

I’ll keep this post updated & mark out the ones I read.

:)

my own collection of amphetamine factoids–

(no particular reason for my studies beyond simple fascination & lack of anything better to do, haha. for years, I’ve taken refuge in getting lost in research over chemicals, neuroscience, pharmacology.. but mostly recreational drugs & their usage.)

AMPHETAMINE
C₉H₁₃N

**I wrote about the things that most interest or pertain to me & my knowledge, understanding, & love for amphetamines; adderall in particular.  if inserting my own opinion on something, I’ll be sure to state that it is my own thought & not a fact.  a lot of this is gathered from various references (see bottom of post for my references), as well as personal experience & even experiences gathered from others (through the use of forums, blogs, etc.)  I hope no one mistakes this random mass gathering of tidbits of information for an actual attempt at anything worth taking seriously– but I hope that it is appreciated for what it is: a blog post about my favourite thing to do: stimulants. :)

[I will update & edit this post accordingly whenever I feel like it] :)

ADDERALL

*TIPS OF THE TRADE:
(my collection of “tips” on taking [more so over binging on ;)] adderall)
• an acidic stomach will decrease the absorption of your adderall.
• getting an acidic stomach after taking it is normal, & pepto pills (any antacid) will help TONS if your tummy’s feeling “bubbly” or anything.
• stay hydrated & don’t sit in the same place/position for TOO terribly long (though it’s hard not to get “couch-locked” or whatever).  make sure you do your body a favour & stretch every couple of hours, but make sure not to overexert yourself (especially if you’ve stayed awake for an extended period of time.)  just treat your body as healthily as possible, & remember to be careful.
• magnesium sulfate: known to SLOW DOWN the rate you build up tolerance, but will probably not completely stop your tolerance from building completely.
• personal opinion: go for IR.
• another personal opinion: snorting really isn’t worth it.  I mean, I enjoy snorting & don’t think it should NEVER be done, but, of course, it’s not exactly a good thing to do to your body; it is a considerable amount less effective than swallowing; it doesn’t last as long;… the list goes on.  I always WANTED to believe snorting was the “better way”, but after a lot of personal trial & skimming through the posts on threads concerning such matter– it’s almost unanimous: just swallow the shit.


WHAT IT IS/DOES:

• stimulant – you can give this name to any drug that increases the rate of physiological function

• a stimulant/psychostimulant (psychoactive drug) that directly effects the mesolimbic reward pathway (a dopaminergic pathway in the brain.)

• similar to other CNS stimulants.

• increases:
— alertness
— libido
— concentration & overall cognitive performance
— improves mood
• decreases:
— fatigue
— appetite

• it increases the amount of dopamine & norepinephrine
— it acts as a potant dopamine & norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor
• amphetamines (in general) exert effects by binding to the monoamine transporters.
— this increases extracellular levels of the biogetic amines:
—– dopamine
—– norepinephrine
—– seratonin
• in the periphery amphetamine acts as a sympathomimetic.
• in the CNS, amphetamine modulates monoamine neurotransmitter release and kinetics.

• with respect to central stimulant actions, the S(+) isomer (dextroamphetamine) is several times more potant than it’s R(-) enantiomer (levoamphetamine).
— dextroamphetamine:
—– induces more euphoria (than levoamphetamine.)
—– (because of the preceding,) higher potential for abuse.
—– the human brain prefers it to levo.
— levoamphetamine:
—– induces more depression • the reason levoamphetamine is included in the mixture (instead of adderall bein

g dextro. alone,) is to provide a quicker onset & longer duration of the drug–

something levo. helps with.

EFFECTS:

• physiological/physical
— agitation/anxiety
— dizziness
— restlessness
— psychosis
— hypertension
— insomnia
— hyperthermia
— tachycardia
— euphoria
— tics
— bruxism (grinding of teeth)
— pallor
(^ these three are very prominent side effects to my “tweaking”/binging of adderall that I find interesting, yet very bothersome in the long run.)
— dilated eyes
— twitching
• psychological
— euphoria
— anxiety
— alertness
— concentration
— energy
— self-esteem/self-confidence
— sociability
— irritability
— psychomotor agitation
— gradiosity
— excessive feelings of power & superiority
— repetitive & obsessive behaviours
— paranoia
— amphetamine psychosis (chronic &/or high doses)

COMPOSED OF:

• dextroamphetamine …
— saccharide
— sulfate
• racemic DL-amphetamine salts …
— aspartate monohydrate
— sulfate

REFERENCES:
#1
#2